(by SockPuppet ~ working for the dole @ Chez Hall)
Prime Minister Tony Abbott is not a brain surgeon or Einstein but he is still smart too and he has said it is not unreasonable to ask job seekers to make 40 job applications a month despite complaints from business that it would increase red tape and be a burden on businesses:
”What we want is job seekers who are active, not passive,” Mr Abbott told 2UE radio.
”It is not an unreasonable expectation or aspiration that we have … we want to ensure that people on unemployment benefits really are serious in looking for work, but we don’t want to unnecessarily burden small business,” he said.
Now I am not good at arithmetic but I have a brother who has a calculator he brought at Woolies for $5 (see above left).
So I asked him to run some numbers and he says it tells this:
550,000 dole bludgers X 40 = 22 million mostly useless job applications per month
AND
22 million X 12 = 264 million (mostly useless) job applications per year
And I am not Einstein either but I reckon there are nuthing like 264 MILLION jobs being offered in Australia every year.
Not even close.
My brother says its probably less than HALF A MILLION and that his Woolies $5 calculator says:
264 million divided by halfa million = 528 applications per job
I will say it again:
Tony Abbotts plan means businesses will get an average of 528 applications for every job.
Or even more because most dole bludgers will not be applying for top paying jobs like:
- CEO , Rocket Scientist, Brain Surgeon, Computer Genius, Nuclear Physicist, Head Chef at the Hilton, Malaysian Airlines Pilot
Or even not-so-top-paying specialist jobs like:
- Train Driver, Lion Tamer, Teacher, Social Media Expert, Senior Writer @ The Age, Lawyer, Adventure Activities Instructor
No, most dole bludgers would be looking at low-paid and low-skilled jobs like:
- Laborer, Factory Hand, Clerk, Shop Assistant, Waiter, Council Worker, Vic Roads Sign Holder
And this means most jobs could get up to 1000 applications.
And that is alot of work and might even create morejobs just to sort out the duds from the real and the shit from the clay sorta thing.
Is that Tonys plan? Create a whole new type of job called:
Job Application Shit Sifter
Or does as I think Tony Abbott needs a $5 calculator just to bring him up to speed?
He can borrow my brothers.
Iain Hall's SANDPIT 
Dear SockPuppet
Brilliant analysis and funny to boot!
Mark Moncrieff
Upon Hope Blog – A Traditional Conservative Future
Thankyou Mark. I am thinking about applying for one of those J.A.S.S. jobs. Youknow, sorting the shit from the clay.
I would want more than the dole though.
If you think a thousand applicants for a single job is unusual, you obviously have never been in a position to advertise a position on SEEK. Take my word for it. If you are a desirable employer, there is nothing unusual about that. Remember that when you prepare you CV and present it, because if the impression it makes in the first five seconds is not good, it is going into the circular file.
You are right KB that I have never employed anyone (well Laura works for me in the park getting laid for $s to help with the site rent but I headhunted her sotospeak) but my brother runs a small business collecting trash from hard waste people throw out on there nature strips and down the council tip and hes looking for another driver. So thanks I will tell him its okay to get 1000 applications and just use SEEK.
Actually Socky Tony Abbott is backpedaling a bit on the numbers just as I suggested in my own post on the topic
I have not seen an report like that Iain but if hes backing down on the 40 job apps for dole bludgers it might mean:
1) He has read my post or
Two) He has been to Woolies and bought a $5 calculator
I heard a sound grab of him on the radio and he was suggesting that the whole thing was a “draft proposal” which sounds like kite flying exercise to me
Another good post, Sockpig, you’re on a roll!
I agree that Abbott’s plan won’t work, but I’m surprised you don’t know why. See, as well as actually knowing some Muslims, like my next door neighbours, I also know some dole bludgers and a Centrelink ‘officer’. He reckons Centrelink hasn’t got the resources to check job applications. Dole bludgers know this. They simply copy ads from the newspaper or online and say they’ve applied for the job. Listing a fax number instead of a phone number for the employer apparently confuses things further.
This satisfies the dole bludger’s quota and also saves companies from being inundated with useless job apps.
So Tony increasing the quota to forty from whatever it was is sheer stupidity. Centrelink won’t have the resources to vet the so-called applications.
Hey, Socky, I bet this is common knowledge at the Blue Gums Caravan Park. Mustafa and Laura would be right on top of it.
Yeah that is what we do to but you should not give away your secrets of ‘how-to-be-a-dole-bludger here on National TV, GigGuy.
The only thing Mustafa gets “on top” of is Laura when I let him. Hes away overseas atm. Somewhere in Syria.
My calculator tells me that under 30 yos will be ‘working for the dole’ @ only $8 per hour ($200 per week divided by 25 hours). Herein lies the contradiction and the bastardry of the Coalition: If Abbott is going to make people work nearly a full week at slave labor rates, by what moral standard does he demand they also apply for 40 jobs per month? You can’t have it both ways.
Only working for 25? There are 168 hours in a week. What will they do with the remaining 143 hours if they aren’t looking for more work? What will they do when the taxpayers’ teats run dry?
Well to start with, 56 of those hours are for sleeping, KB. And if you’re working 5 hours per day plus spending up to 2 hours to & from, there ain’t a lot of time left for job searching.
Have you not considered the obvious? It’s not the amount of jobs people apply for that increases their chances of finding employment. It’s the amount of time they spend in finding a job they might be qualified for. This 40 apps per month actually wastes their time (as does the 25 hours working for the dole in meaningless jobs).
I was under the impression that no-one would waste everyone’s time applying for a job for which they are NOT ‘qualified’. When you’re down and out, there is no harm in applying for those for which one is OVER ‘qualified’. It’s easier to ignore ‘qualifications’ than it is to fake them.
If you are applying for 40 jobs per month (plus working 5 hours per day) because that’s what you “have to do” to keep your lousy $200 per week, you are less likely to find a job.
To (further) qualify: it’s like GD said – the real bludgers will laugh at this requirement and know that their so-called 40 apps will never get checked up on. In other words, Abbott’s policy further cements the real bludgers in their ‘I can beat the system’ position.
And as for those genuinely looking for work, the requirement to work 5 hours per day Mon-Fri (plus travelling time and transport costs) in a meaningless so-called ‘Community Service’ job AND to find 40 job ads to apply for AND to earnestly make those applications, detracts enormously from their ability and time to actually find a job.
Bull. If you are organised, and have two or three versions of your CV all ready, and several letters of application ready to go for editing, it takes all of ten minutes to submit an online application from an internet ad. That means that for a paltry hour a day, one can search several online recruiters, and submit at least two professional looking applications. What are you talking about?
Yes, it’s easy for the real dole bludgers to submit 40 meaningless applications per month and keep the dole. Can I take it you agree with me then (and with GD) that this new requirement won’t stop the real bludgers bludging?
I’m talking about the genuine job seekers. Merely emailing off 40 pre-prepared applications to join the pile of up to 1000 other applications from other dole recipients (per job, ie 40,000 in total) is like entering a job lottery and going through the motions. The best way to find a job is on foot. By knocking on doors. By turning up, not by waiting forlornly by your computer or iPhone for someone to reply to your one-of-1000 applications.
And the really dumb part of this plan is that it won’t help anyone find a job above & beyond the numbers who are already finding one under the present system. Think about it – those jobs are being filled already, so by just making more people apply for them it won’t (can’t logically) get more people off the dole.
Well, I think it’s great that the kind of people who vote liberal will be swamped by the paperwork that their own delusional beliefs about the jobless have created.
Especially risible is the stipulation that job applications made electronically don’t count. Could they more devastatingly demonstrate that they don’t know what century it is?
Go down to your local city centre, find a person sleeping rough, a person who has nothing – nothing in the world (he’ll be male, and possibly a divorce-court victim), and ask yourself “how is this person supposed to go about making 10 job applications a week?”. How are they supposed to get to job interviews, when they have to beg for food?
Ray, for once I agree, however, as Iain says, this won’t come to pass.
I wasn’t aware of that, Paul. If it’s true then it’s not just “risible”, it’s impossible to comply with. Are they saying that all applications must be sent by post? At 70 cents per letter that’s (gets calculator out) $28 per month. And if you’re under 30 it’s six months before you qualify to get the dole but you still have to make 40 applications per month in that time. How can anyone think it’s reasonable to impose a condition like that without giving any benefits?
Whether they water it down or not, GD, the damage is done. The message is clear: This Govt hates the people it purports to represent.
And they will pay for it big time at the next election. Think about all those under 30 yos – how many do you think will vote Coalition next time? And think of all those approaching retirement or already on the pension. Landslide mate.
I don’t think Abbott wants to be leader anymore—too hard, just like his cock, when he was shagging all those virgins, after he left the Catholic Seminar.
Top Post, this one, I hear puddles of water everywhere in the Liberal Party Room, after they read this post, pissing themselves with absolute fear, after reading Ray Dixon’s last comment, methinks The Liberal Party will be wiped out at the next election, not Whyalla as they told us.
Thanks Richie for your Teste Monial. I am tryinnnnnnnnnnnnnng real hard to be the best try hard blogger here.
Sorry my finger got stuck on the nnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
You apparently miss the point that it is sometimes necessary to MOVE to find employment. You can’t go knocking on doors all over the bloody continent.
No, KB, I didn’t (and do not) dismiss the notion of relocation to take up a new job – we weren’t even talking about that. Anyway you seem to have the cart before the horse when you suggest people should “MOVE to find employment”, because just moving elsewhere without first having a job lined up would be a bit risky and unaffordble for most dole recipients, I’d suggest. Nothing wrong with applying for a job at, say, a WA mining company but you’d want to be pretty sure you had the job first, wouldn’t you? And how many dole recipients do you think that would help?
Geez, Sockpig, don’t tell me you’re cuddling up to moron ryan like Ray does. FFS, what is it with leftards? Birds of a foul feather flock together?
Ray:
Yeah, sure it does, just in for a quick buck and then out of here. Ray, Tony Abbott has been in politics longer than most ministers. Do you really think he wants to do damage to Australia? On the other hand, Gillard and Rudd did do damage. They had no previous ministerial experience, blew the surplus on figments of their imagination and drove the country into the largest debt in its history.
No, Tony Abbott doesn’t hate Australia like the communist Gillard and socialist, narcissistic Rudd did.
As for your prediction about a landslide:
Don’t count your chickens, Ray. Your mate Ryan reckoned that Tony Abbott would never be leader of this country. It cost him a bottle of Scotch in a bet with Iain. Typically Ryan stumped up a measly $20. It’s a good thing that Iain doesn’t drink. I’d hate to think what sort of Scotch he’d get for $20.
He’d be better off drinking Victory Gin
I do not “cuddle up” to blokes left or right GigGuy. I am above politics (sort of like a Daiherty I guess) but a Teste monials is a testa monial and I accept them even from you.
I didn’t say he wants to “damage Australia”, GD, but I don’t see him improving it in any way, shape or form. He hasn’t got a clue how to do that.
What I did say is that his Govt seems to hate those they purport to represent and you don’t have to look too far to find evidence of this hate or (to use less emotive terms) disregard and contempt – it’s been all over the news this week with their contemptible proposals for those on the dole. You might have heard about it; in fact you have agreed that it’s “stupid”, right here in this thread – scroll up. Then there’s the same contempt being shown to older people nearing retirement or already on pensions. Of course, anyone earning big $s and any large corporation will receive benefits from this Govt … at the expense of the vast majority.
You can wallow in the past and refer to ALP politicians no longer in Parliament as much as you like but I’m dealing with the now and the near future. And I’m simply predicting that this
hatredcontempt & disregard Abbott’s Govt is displaying for the vast majority (many of whom would have voted for them less than 12 months ago) will (a) not be forgotten (b) come back and bite them very hard at the next election.Unless of course you seriously think this stuff is a vote winner!!!! LMAO.
proof that my cutting edge posts attract cutting edge comedy geniuses too?:
I have reduced the size (*) of your big Gin Bottle GigGuy. It was taken up to much space and anyway you need to cut down.
(* another technical mirracle)
Tony Abbott looks worn out, maybe suffering from all those “broken promises” he made.
I hear from a good source, that Abbott uses a Chinese abacus for his calculations, the user of an abacus is called an abacist, hence his surname is Abbott.
I do not want to be seen by GigGuy to be “cuddling up” to you Richie because I know you and me are not gay so I will just say that I think Tony Abbotts abacist must be like my brothers Woolies $5 calculator that only goes up to 8 digits. I will send Tony an email to tell he needs to multiply the result by 10. In his head. That is add a zero. On paper. Do not rely on technology. Use your brains sorta thing.
“cuddling up”? GD the muso man is a specialist in that field, he is not gay, just strange.
NEWS FLASH! The reason I hear Tony Abbott looks stressed and worn out is I hear he has been reading the comments on this blog over the past few days, and he finds the comments very unAustralian. What can I say? RIPPER.
If Tony was an america he could not be there Prime mincer or is it Precedent? He is English born so how did that get passed the books?
This is an exact quote of what Tony Abbott said about the 40 job applications & working-for-the dole requirement:
‘Looking for work should be a full-time job if it’s being done on the commonwealth taxpayer.’
Repeat: it’s a FULL TIME JOB.
Read it any way you like but unless he’s an absolute idiot there are only two interpretations you can put on those words:
1) Tony Abbott is so out of touch that he thinks $205 per week is a full time wage, or
2) Tony Abbott’s secret plan is to increase the dole to the min wage of $600+ per week.
It’s one or the other. Can’t mean anything else (unless Abbott has an IQ of about 75)
Yes Ray I saw that on Insiders this morning and it does look like a bit of an own goal and frankly it looks more like an argument against WFTD Maybe they should say if you are doing the 40 apps a month then you should be exempt from WFTD
As GD pointed out too, Iain, this 40 apps per month can never be checked up on and plays right into the hands of those who do NOT want a job. Worse still, it makes it harder for the genuine jobseekers because they will now be competting against a lot more applicants.
When is someone in the Opposition or Media going to point out the bloody obvious, being:
The (few *) jobs that exist are already being filled under the present system, ergo making more people apply for them will not reduce unemployment.
(* It’s estimated by the University of Sydney that there are not much more than 100,000 job vacancies per year).
Ray did you miss my original post on WFTD?
Your comment s are so inane they should be on the ABC. Of course it’s a full time job. Not all jobs are paid. You said so yourself. Do you enjoy being asinine?
Yes, I did read it, Iain, and while you made some very good points (and while it’s clear you don’t agree with this plan), I think you tried to play it down and make excuses for Abbott’s proposals (let’s face it, Abbott IS the one driving this), dismissing it as ‘just politics’. You also reached the wrong conclusion:
Wrong. The Government does not need to legislate changes to the way it adminsters the dole. It’s not required.
And I think the opposite to you in that I believe Abbott is serious about this (and worse ideas *). Because he despises anyone on welfare. Anyone except the likes of Rinehart & Twiggy Forest should get NO GOVT ASSISTANCE whatsoever is how he sees it. He knows he can’t take it all away so what he’ll do is punish them. Over & over. Well, they’ll punish ONE-TERM-TONY right back.
(* Abbott is a supporter of Forest’s absurd plan to ban welfare recipients from getting their hands on any cash and, instead, they should have a card that prevents them from buying ‘things he does not approve of’. You know, things like giving your kid a few dollar coins to spend at the tuck shop. Great!)
Your idiotic conflation and logical fallacies would make you a big hit with Mark Scott.
No need for the insults KB.
I didn’t say that. To put up my quotes you just have to 1) find them (not hard) and 2) copy them (not hard either) and (here’s the tricky bit) 3) paste them in your comment.
If you don’t know the correct HTML code for blockquoting just make sure you put them between a pair of these ” and preface them with “Ray said”.
More insults, KB? Doesn’t cut it mate.
Hey, you have contradicted yourself.
First you said here: https://iainhall.wordpress.com/2014/07/30/calculators-does-tony-abbott-have-one/#comment-89077
Then you just said here: https://iainhall.wordpress.com/2014/07/30/calculators-does-tony-abbott-have-one/#comment-89074
So which of your above claims is the falsehood?
Like all lefties, you are a master of the straw man.
I thought you would take my ABC recommendations as a compliment.
It might also be a good idea, KB, if you opened your comments by addressing the person you are responding to. You know, by starting it with “Ray,” or at least making it clear in your text that you’re talking to me. For instance, your insult at 11.13 could be construed as being directed at Iain, seeing his was the one above it. There’s no harm in exercising civility, KB.
Also, KB, it’s generally a good idea to actually debate the issues instead of putting up glib one liners attacking the person.
Ray
Yes I do oppose it for a number of sound reasons, it won’t work and even if did precisely what they claim it will its very bad politics to bring about such changes this way. My Business owning brother naturally thinks that its a good idea but even he thinks the 40 a month is silly.
Ay least some of the mooted changes will require enabling legislation Ray and don’t for get that changes by regulation can also be challenged in the Senate so they won’t just have Carte blanche to make such changes
I’m sure that Abbott understands that having a welfare system the price of a truly civil society, in any event he also knows that the biggest cohort of those on welfare is those who are getting the old age pension and they tend to vote LNP so don’t kid yourself that he is going to throw everyone off welfare, no matter how much the economic dries would want him to.
(* Abbott is a supporter of Forest’s absurd plan to ban welfare recipients from getting their hands on any cash and, instead, they should have a card that prevents them from buying ‘things he does not approve of’. You know, things like giving your kid a few dollar coins to spend at the tuck shop. Great!)
Did you miss what Abbott said about Twiggy’s scheme? he repeated it for emaphasis he said, and I paraphrase:
“Its a very courageous and brave scheme” which as Bolt pointed out is almost a direct quote from “yes minister”
Abbott is not Dumb Ray no matter how often you claim otherwise he may realize that there is some
What’s a “leftie”, KB? Anyone who votes ALP is a “leftie”, is that right? So going by current opinion polls, about 55% of the population are “lefties”?
And what’s a “strawman”? Someone who nitpicks a small point of someone else’s argument, right? Well, you put up no argument at all today (only insults) so it could hardly be said that my retorts to you were “strawman” tactics, now could it?
That’s why WordPress prefaces a comment with “in response to Ray Dixon” when the commenter selects “REPLY”.
I am appalled that you construed my suggestion of a successful career on the ABC as an insult. Your twisted logic and leftist bias could complement Trioli or Kelly very well. You would be sure to make a big hit with Tony Jones.
Iain:
1. The Govt needs no Parliamentary approval whatsoever to adjust the terms on which they hand out the dole. Zero.
2. I did not say Abbott “is going to throw everyone off welfare”, I said I believe he’d like to but knows he can’t.
3. Abbott actually said (about Forest’s draconian ideas) that “it’s a bit ahead of public opinion – AT THE MOMENT – but that doesn’t rule out us doing something like that in the coming years and months”. Or words very close to that . He clearly endorsed it as a worthwhile aim.
4. Abbott IS stupid, Iain.
KB, the WordPress comment feature does not say “in response to … ” anyone. It says: “Leave a Reply” and “Enter your comment here”. If you can’t work out:
1) How to type someone’s name
2) How to select, copy & paste someone’s words you claim they’ve said
3) How to actually debate an issue
4) How to be civil
5) How to avoid insulting others
6) How to stop labelling people
7) How to play the ball and not the man
8) How to better articulate your point of view
Then please don’t waste my time.
Here’s the Abbott quote, Iain:
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-08-01/abbott-rules-out-expansion-of-income-management-measures/5640280
That’s an endorsement.
KB, I’d take that as a grievous insult. The ABC is an out of control, leftist propagandising, taxpayer funded media outlet with a hated for Tony Abbott. The ABC bemoans the fact that the Libs have won the election, the Libs have stopped the boats and the Libs are dealing with the obscene deficit/debt that Labor bequeathed them. The Libs are also working around a billion dollar monthly interest payment for Labor’s failures.
All the ABC can do is set up a ‘promise checking’ department. Funny that they didn’t think of that when Labor held the reins. Funny the ABC didn’t question the number of boats arriving illegally under the Rudd/Gillard fiasco. The number of children in detention during Labor’s disastrous six years was far greater than now, the influx of illegal queue jumpers numbered 50,000 and tragically 1,200 lives were lost at sea.
The ABC wasn’t particularly concerned about those shocking statistics, yet somehow think it worthwhile to attack Tony Abbott for ‘broken promises’.
Yes, KB, I’d take the suggestion of a successful career at the ABC as an insult.
cheers and keep commenting, don’t let Ray put you off.
Not funny when these Aussie fighter target war mongers in this country.
Agreed. I took the joker eating a bar of soap in his avatar to be an egregious troll. 🙂
Terrorism: The blow back from Iraq, which lies in ruins, thanks to the three amigos,Bush, Blair, Howard. War Criminals, who I hope get their rewards.
Good to see that KB agrees with Richard Ryan.