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SockPuppet’s art lessons for non-artists

In this the first of my new series of Art for non-artists, I teach youse how to win The Wynne Prize for Australian Landscape painting and pocket a cool $25,000:

Step 1: Take an old but famous painting like this Dutch landscape from 1668

Step 2: Photocopy or scan it onto a smaller piece of paper so it looks like this:

Step 3: Apply some white-out:

Step 4: Darken the tone, colour in the bits, add a few stars and voila:

You is a master and you will fool the judges into thinking this is an original work and that it’s an Aussie landscape not a Dutch one.

And not only will you win $25,000 but also, lots of arty chicks will want to have sex with you.

(PS: Iain, I think you need an Art category, I am on a roll here)


7 Comments

  1. SockPuppet says:

    I forgot to say that you should take special care in applying the white out. Make it thick and then the judges will think you used a pelett brush.

  2. Iain Hall says:

    New category added for your writing pleasure Socky 😉

  3. Husky Jim says:

    In another place there is a whining little bitchman that would argue that being able to steal other paople’s work is his right.

  4. SockPuppet says:

    Leach (what a good name for a copycat artist!) has also done a self portrate that was a portrate of Hitler that he changed to hisself using the above method. But he only had to add a beard.

    The Leach also won the Archieballs prize for his ‘painting’ of Tim Munchin which looked more like a photo too me.

  5. SockPuppet says:

    Have a look:

    Does that look like a painting or a photo?

  6. Husky Jim says:

    Painting.

  7. SockPuppet says:

    It might be a painting over a photo. That’s another trick I will teach in the future.

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